It’s become a bit of a tradition for my niece and I to go to Gardner Village the day after Thanksgiving. While the crazies are fighting over $12 plasma televisions, it’s lovely to stroll around the little shops and admire the Christmas decorations. And, at some point each year, we stop at the bakery—usually for lunch. But, since we’d gotten off to a rather late start with breakfast around noon, we opted out of lunch and decided on a quick snack before concluding our trip into quaintness. My whopping bill came to $2.64, so I decided to pay with cash. When I paid, the clerk handed me change from $10.
Me: “Umm, I gave you a twenty.”The clerk then handed me a $10 bill.
Clerk: “I’m so sorry. That’s the second
time I’ve done that today.”
Me: “No problem.”
Later that evening, I was emptying my pockets and getting settled at my friend’s house, when I discovered I had too much cash. (Not a problem to which I am accustomed.) Ten dollars too much to be precise. It appears that in my excitement over snack time, I had completely forgotten that I had broken my $20 at breakfast that day, and had indeed paid for my snack with a $10 bill.
I always thought that when I turned to a life of crime, it would be big and splashy and earn me one of those two-hour specials on a primetime news magazine. If I’m going down, I may as well make it worth it. Turns out my scandalous nature looks a whole lot like senility and not so much like the work of a criminal mastermind.
10 comments:
Hey, someday a clerk will hand you too much change, and you'll return it. What goes around comes around, and you'll get your chance for redemption.
(Or maybe I should stop watching "My Name is Earl")
I actually went back to the bakery on Monday and stood in line in order to tell my ridiculous story to the teenage cashier. She was a little baffled, but at least I have that $10 off my conscience.
You are too good!! :) $10 is certainly not worth losing sleep over though, so I don't blame you one bit!
You need a sidekick and a cool costume before you embark on a true life of crime.
I heard the news that you were staying in California. I have never been to that area of California, I need to think of an excuse to make Jesse let me come visit!
I would have returned it too...although at least they took your money. My mom tried to give $2000.00 back to the government one time and no one could figure out how to take it back. And we wonder why they are broke?
Kelly,
I love your blog, you're hillarious! (as if I haven't said that enough already...)
I wonder if true criminals try this all the time. If not, maybe you could be a consultant for them.
I'm about a year and a half late, but I just found your blog from another and this is one of the funniest blog posts I've ever read.
Anon, if you're going to say nice things like that, you're welcome to come by anytime.
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